Dragonball Z: How it Should Have Ended
by maximusrexmundi
Summary: Lets face it people, we ALL know what REALLY should have happened at (insert DBZ moment here) *Series of one-offs*
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer (insert stuff amounting to me not owning dbz)

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Chapter 1: Raditz

The fight had been going down hill from the start. Goku knew that at this rate, his brother would kill them both, and likely the rest of the planet if he didn't think of something. Then, like a ray of hope, he say a tuft of brown around his brothers waist.

'A TAIL! If he is anything like me, squeezing it will cripple him! Its our only chance.'

Feinting left as Piccolo darted in once more, he sped behind his evil sibling, and just as the latter was dodging another jab from his enemy turned ally, grabbed with all his might the furry appendage.

"Ah ha!" He yelled in triumph.

The battlefield took on an eerie silence at this, to any onlooker, odd action. Piccolo looked perplexed. What was this fool DOING?! Did he think this was a game?! Raditz though, wore a grimace, his face contorted. Slowly, at least to those present, he fell to his face, muffled sounds coming from the impacted ground.

"Quick Piccolo! Take him out while I hold him!"Goku screamed at the Demon.

Not one to waste an opportunity, Piccolo started charging his technique. Raditz continued to lay there, the only sign he was even with them his continuous twitching. The seconds felt like hours as they trickled away.

"Its ready Goku!" Yelled Piccolo. "Special Beam Ca-"

In a flash of crimson, an arm went shooting through Piccolo's chest. After a swift removal, the body of Piccolo fell to the ground.

"Wha-"

"Oh..." Raditz began, wiping a tear from his eye, "you should see your face! Its priceless! Hahaha! Grabbing my tail... that's a good one little brother! You HONESTLY thought that would work? Tell me, when did you first find out it was a weakness?"

Goku stared at him blankly. Terror was creeping through his every vein.

"Oh well. Needless to say, considering it is literally our only weakness, Sayian children were trained on our planet to resist its crippling aspects. I'm rather surprised you thought that would work, honestly."

He frowned, a look of concentration on his face as if he were considering something.

"Yes... let's face it, if THAT was your best plan, that blow to the head must have done more than remove your programming. I guess you'd be no real help to us after all. Farewell brother."

And with that, he grabbed his brother, who still had the look of a man lost at sea, and with one swift chop, broke his neck. Going swiftly to his pod, he remembered the child inside.

'Hopefully he turns out better...'

And with that, Gohan still knocked out under his arm, Raditz, in his ship, flew into the sky, never to be seen again.

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A/N

I've always loves the HISHE series, and lets face it, in DBZ, there are a LOOOOOT of 'bad calls' by the heroes that are made to create drama, or REEEEAAALLY convenient aspects (good or bad) to villains added to make them more/less threatening.

I'm going to just do these as they come to me so don't expect any order to them.


	2. Chapter 2: The post-Cell days

Disclaimer: I own nothing of note

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"And here he is lady and gentlemen! Your savior! He who single handedly defeated the monster Cell: Hercule Satan!"

The cacophony of sound that had been a celebration was shattered by the words ringing from the television. In the room was a most odd assortment of characters. There was a three-eyed man and a Chinese Vampire, an aged man and a pig, a bald monk making advances on a stunning blonde, a scarred pretty boy and a floating cat, a green giant, two mad women, a scowling adult, and a timid boy playing with a purple haired baby while conversing with a bubbly blonde and a smoking scientist.

This mad group of people were known to themselves and the privileged few as the Z fighters, the many-times-over saviors of the planet, and the true source of the creature Cell's demise.

The first sound from the now stony crowd was a snarl from Vegeta, and oddly enough, a shriek from Chi Chi (ha! Like she needs an excuse to shriek).

"Those b*****ds are stealing my precious baby's credit! Somebody do something! You all love showing off your muscles any chance you get! Go take care of this!"

"But mom... I don't want this attention..."

"Nonsense!" Chi Chi declared, zeni signs in her eyes, "you're going to take that credit Gohan, and any money they give you! We could buy SOOOO many books for you! And a private tutor army! And entrance to the best private schools! And even..." she trailed off muttering to herself.

The rest of the crowd decided to just let her be...

"So do you guys think we should expose ourselves?" Asked the ever innocent Gohan.

"I... guess? To be honest I didn't know we weren't 'exposed' already..." remarked the triclops. "I mean, the stuff we do isn't exactly low key, and on top of that literally thousands of people saw us do 'impossible' feats at the WMAT a dozen years back."

"Yeah!" Concurred Yamcha, "I've literally made a career out of doing superhuman feats in sports! Nobody has really questioned it before!"

"And to top it off Gohan," this time it was Bulma to speak up, "whenever we summon the Dragon, all SORTS of crazy stuff happens! And we've done that a looooot... the populace barely even notices an enormous dragon popping up any more. That and you'll have the support of me! The most powerful person on the planet! If they disagree I'll just happen to not release or manufacture and CC products! We do have an exclusive monopoly on literally all goods in the world..."

"I love it when you're hostile..."

"Shh Vegeta not now," Bulma twittered blushing.

Gohan considered all this.

"Kay! Lets go show them who really saved them!"

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45 minutes later

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"Wow that was easier than I thought!"

"Gohan? You really need to learn, the population here on earth is literally as dumb as a rock," explained Krillin, "Roshi freaking blew up the moon, and people just brushed it off! Piccolo too! No scientific inquiry whatsoever. I'm actually surprised they demanded as much demonstration as they did."

"... but all I did was lift a car and arm wrestle that hairy guy!"

"Just smile and wave Gohan, smile and wave."

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And so earth pretty much went on the same, except without as much shouting from one particular man. People kinda gave up worshipping Gohan, because let's face it, Goku saved them at least three times from populace crushing tyrants, and they forgot about him as soon as he left the city. The rest is all for your imagination!

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A/N

Sorry it's been so long. Been busy applying to schools. This story was inspired by all the post-Cell stories I've been seeing lately, and by the one step I'd wish someone would take (while sticking with the actual mindset of the DBZ populace, aka "am I in danger? No? Don't care about anything")


End file.
